Separation Anxiety and Ways to Prevent the Destructive Aftermath

A dog is a social animal.  As a puppy, he learns that making noise brings his mother to him. So barking, whining, crying and even howling are all natural reactions when he wants to be reunited with his family.

If he is punished for these actions, the result is usually stepped-up activity and the situation worsens.  If possible, remain calm and ignore the destruction. That may prove difficult but understanding the situation from his viewpoint is essential.

In his world, being left alone is not "natural", DOGS ARE PACK ANIMALS. In an effort to regain normalcy and reunite with his pack, he may dig out of an enclosed yard or demolish an inside door, he will do anything in order to escape and find his pack! 

Some dogs become so anxious that they tear up objects indiscriminately, defecate or urinate without control. Again, scolding will only cause your dog more stress.

Some owners simply do not know how to handle the destructive behavior and become so overwhelmed that they end up giving the dog away (to some other unsuspecting soul), euthanizing him, or take him to the local pound.

Before employing any of these drastic measures, consider using High Anxiety. High Anxiety is specifically formulated for dogs suffering with Anxiety, Fear, Aggression and other stress related conditions. Use this spray calmer before training and especially before leaving your dog alone for any length of time. Remember, the reason you got a dog was for companionship, enjoy your pal and help him relax, naturally.

Separation Anxiety - Help Your Dog Survive Being Alone, Without Destroying Your Home!

by © Stacy Braslau-Schneck, CPDT

Much of what is called "separation anxiety" is really boredom, or the dog discovering the chance to engage in his favorite "hobbies" safely. If your dog spends every second that you're home glued to your side, including sleeping times, and any destruction you find happens within the first 20 minutes of your absence (use a video camera to watch, or come back within a short time period) then it's possible that you have a true case of separation anxiety. If your dog can spend the night away from you, and is comfortable being somewhat separated from you while you're home, you probably do not really have separation anxiety - you are more likely to be dealing with boredom or just inappropriate chewing, barking, digging, etc.

It Is Likely to Be Separation Anxiety If...

The dog chews on a variety of things, but chewing is often focused on items that smell most like you (or a particular person in your house) such as recently discarded clothes, including underwear or socks, or favorite chairs; and /or escape routes (doors or windows). The dog only chews these items when you're gone. (If your dog chews on a few goodies, like the couch, or chews on things even when you're around, you have a house proofing problem - see the other training tips for advice).

  • The dog tries to stay close to the things that smell most of you (chewed stuff will still be warm when you get home)
  • The dog pees or poops inappropriately, in many locations.
  • The dog barks continuously during the day, perhaps after a build-up of whining. The barking is not on-off-on-off. (For other kinds of barking, see the Barking Training Tip.)
  • The dog always shows these behaviors when left alone.
  • The dog is wild to greet you, and is still stressed, anxious and clingy when you first arrive home. The dog does not appear "guilty" over destroyed items.
  • Destruction begins soon after you leave.
  • The dog cannot be isolated from you at any time, even in a different room with the door closed.
  • The dog sleeps with you. (This does not mean that all dogs who sleep with their owners will get separation anxiety. It does mean that dogs that survive being apart from you at night can survive it during the day, too).
  • The dog gets increasingly distressed as you prepare to leave.

Sometimes, the dog can be left alone in a car (for any length of time) or other unusual location, without showing anxiety or destructiveness.

Things You Can Do to Help

Try to make your arrivals and departures very boring and low-key. Don't make a big fuss over saying hello and goodbye. Be very casual and up-beat.

Get your dog used to your getting-ready-to-leave cues, like picking up keys and jacket. Go through these actions repeatedly during the time when you're staying home, without actually leaving. If your dog has already learned to associate his fears with your departure cues, it will take a lot of repetitions before the dog will get it.

Give your dog more exercise. A tired dog is a good dog! A dog can sleep most of the day if he's tired enough. Most young dogs could use 20-100 minutes of full-speed running per day. Increase your dog's exercise. Don't forget mental exercise, like training, exploring new places, encountering new smells, and social interaction with other dogs. Taking your dog to a park where he can run and play with others may be crucial.

Give your dog something to do while you're gone! What does your dog do all day? Wait around for you to come home? Give your dog an hobby. Jean Donaldson calls the solution to a lot of dog problems "work-to-eat" programs. Stuff a Kong or a hollow prepared bone, fill up a Buster Cube or Roll-A-Treat, scatter the dog's food in the grass or hide several chew treats around the house. A dog that is working for goodies is not barking or chewing, and a dog that is eating is not very stressed!

Don't draw attention to forbidden objects just before leaving - in other words, don't straighten up or point out the items that you don't want the dog to chew. Your dog might misinterpret your attention and give those objects his attention just because of it.

Consider crating your dog. Some dogs are more comfortable when confined to a small "den". Make sure your dog can "hold it" for as long as you need him to, and provide plenty of exercise so that his main activity in the crate is sleeping. You might just want to consider leaving your dog in one room (rather than giving him the run of the house), and maybe leaving a radio on and an article of clothing that smells like you in the next room. Warning: Some dogs are a lot less comfortable confined to a crate when alone. Make sure your dog is comfortable and secure.

Consider taking your dog to doggie daycare or to a friend's house (or to work), so that he is not actually alone, while you train your dog to deal with being alone. Remember, dogs are pack animals that want to be with others; being a "lone wolf" can be dangerous in the wild, as well as lonely. Note that for many dogs who have bonded strongly with people, having another dog (or other pet) around will not be sufficient.

If Your Dog Has Serious Separation Anxiety

Serious separation anxiety is indicated by a dog who does major property damage (chews holes through walls), injures himself in his anxiety (scratches or rubs paws or nose raw in digging or chewing), or stresses himself to the point of exhaustion during your absence. While stop-gap measures, like keeping the dog with you or with another person, will help while you train, you will need to spend a lot of time teaching this type of dog that he can survive being alone.

Start by making sure your dog is getting enough exercise, including mental exercise (usually satisfied with some training and the chance to interact with other dogs or explore new places). Before you can retrain your dog (and it may take weeks), arrange for the dog to not be alone - get a pet sitter, join a doggy daycare, or leave your dog with a friend who's home all day.

Next, pick a day (or two) when you can practice desensitization without having to actually leave - a weekend is a pretty good time to start.

Desensitize Your Dog to Your "Getting-Ready-to-Go" Cues

Figure out what begins your dog's anxiety. Is it when you put on your work shoes? Brush your hair? Pick up your keys? Find the earliest item in your getting-ready-to-go sequence that makes your dog anxious. Then practice doing that action, over and over again, until your dog is no longer anxious about it. For example, put on your work shoes, then take them off, then put them on again, over and over. You don't need to talk to your dog or do anything else special. Act just like you do every morning when you put on those shoes. When your dog is no longer anxious when you put on your shoes, move to the next step in your normal morning sequence; perhaps brushing your hair. (Note that if your dog's anxiety does not decrease after several repetitions, you are probably not working on the first item in your getting-ready-to-go sequence, and you'll need to back up).

You will have to spend a LOT of time with the early items in your getting-ready-to-go sequence, but as your dog learns to deal with this sort of thing, it will get easier. Opening up the front door (presumably the last item in your getting-ready-to-go sequence) will take fewer repetitions than the first item (putting on work shoes, in this example).

Practice Short-Enough Absences

When you've worked through your whole getting-ready-to-go sequence and your dog is no longer anxious, you're ready for your first absence session. Up to now, your dog with separation anxiety has associated absences with intense anxiety. The dog has to know learn to associate absences with a lack of anxiety, or calmness. You and the dog will practice being apart from each other for very short lengths of time - the time that your dog can handle - and you will gradually practice longer and longer lengths.

So you've gone through your whole getting-ready-to-go sequence, and your dog is not yet anxious (if your dog is anxious, you are not ready to do any absences. Go over repeating the sequence items until your dog is calm about them). Now you're ready for your first very short absence. Walk out the door, shut it behind you, lock it, and then turn around, unlock it, and come back in. Don't make a fuss over the dog. Repeat. When your dog is not anxious, lengthen your absence to 2 seconds. Repeat until your dog is not anxious. Lengthen your absences to 3 seconds, with occasional 1-second absences. Repeat until your dog is not anxious. Continue with this process, gradually increasing the length of time you are gone, until the dog is alone for longer than your normal absence. (Yes, that means you will NOT be able to really leave the dog alone for longer than you've successfully practiced. Hire a dog sitter.)

It might help to set up some cues that the dog will not be alone for longer than he can handle, in other words, that this is just a practice session. Do you normally leave the radio or TV on when you're home? If you do, the silence when you're gone is a good indicator that the dog is alone. During this training, set up a cue that says "this is just a practice", such as the sound of the radio or a Mozart CD that you leave on "repeat" on the CD player. When you really do leave, you will continue to play this same cue - the dog will always believe that this is just a practice session.